How Julius Caesar Got Me Through High School

“The die has been cast.”

A 4 year battle is fought while attending high school.

Teachers send wave and wave of assignments that could eclipse Julius Caesar’s legions.

Homework must be flanked and made craven to its master, you.

Live by the verse; “I love the name of honor, more than I fear death.”

“It’s better to create than to learn! Creating is the essence of life.”

Creation of the motivation to achieve is needed to survive.

“Men freely believe that which they desire.”

But also, “men in general are quick to believe that which they wish to be true.”

Be the man who makes what he freely desires to be the quickest to believe!

Take arms! Grab a book in your strong left arm, and a pencil in your stronger right arm! Be prepared!

“No one is so brave that he is not disturbed by something unexpected.”

“It is not these well-fed long-haired men that I fear, but the pale and the hungry-looking.”

For these men who look weak, will fight the hardest; do not let them catch you off guard.

Treat every test like the malevolent hungry-looking man; do not take the weak ones lightly and let gash you.

Always treat thy teacher of each class with esteem.

Especially learn from the teacher named Experience; “Experience is the teacher of all things.”

Those who do not become acquainted with their teacher are cowards; “cowards die many times before their actual deaths.”

You will become mighty from this - what it feels like - 4 score war.

“I came, I saw, I conquered. “

YOLO

You Only Live Once.
A phrase that makes any reckless activity venial.
A phrase that takes you away from high scrupulous way of life, and lets you live young, wild, and free.
A phrase that should expunge any doubt and any ascertain worry.
A phrase that for the nonchalant.
A phrase that for those who are affiliated, should bequeath it to the generation.
A phrase that has an invulnerable effect.
A phrase that has a potential attainment with the result.
Your life is finite. 
You Only Live Once.

We Students Stand Against Misinformed Teachers

In any kind of formal writing, the writer will need an urbane wit to make is enjoyable to read. But like most seniors in their second semester, they could care less about making their paper exhilarating. What most teachers should understand, the first essay being turned in at 1145pm on the night it is due at 1159pm is the precedent on how it is going to be. We students are lazy and just want to alienate from any sort of hard work in our last semester ever that you will try to harass us with. If you assign us math problems every day of the new semester, you have just turned into our adversary, and your demise will be swift. There is no muse any teacher can give students to motivate us to get into any kind of research over something lame like "Personalities of the Human Brain,". That research in the end will be negligible for real life work, and will make us delete your class for some pointless culinary art class. And one day, a politician will remember his hard life in school, then redress the factors that made high school pointless and hopefully we will be free. 

Chuck Norris vs. the Dos Aquis Guy

Two adroit men stand across from each other in gigantic pasture. Both knowing that it is not feasible an amicable feeling could grow between them. Each man having an anti-benevolent respect towards their opponent. This battle, Chuck Norris versus the Dos Aquis Guy will be the most epic duel of all time of humanity's history, their audience is even in jeopardy of getting caught in the crossfire. Although there is no averse among the audience, everyone is on the edge of their seats waiting to see which man will arise to be victor and be the subject of extol for ages. It almost seems maddening that there can be a victor between these two legendary figures whose reputation has been being impervious to pain and fault, it can be compared to an unmovable object being hit by an unstoppable force. Suddenly, Chuck's face turns to a grimace as he scrutinizes the power before him. The Dos Aquis Guy suspects this as duplicity and launches his body at full force towards Chuck Norris and when both fists of each men touch, an explosion equivalent to Hiroshima's holocaust is created and once the smoke cleared a new figure appeared between the two startled men. The new figure was a man who was clenching the two legends' fists and his name was revealed to be Eli Manning. Eli was always known as being a buzz-kill.

The Insidious Joke Excalibur

One time in history, there was a insidious, stolid man named Jerry. Jerry wasn't a very opulent mannered man, but one of his dour hobbies was finding jokes and making them not funny or killing them. He will hear someone tell a hilarious joke at a comedy club or bar, then he will tell the same one verbatim, but ruin the punch line. An example would be he heard the ol' classic "why the chicken cross the road," and instead of the actual answer, he will use "the chicken's mind is pliable and lacks the fortitude to make its own decisions." The Insidious Joke Excalibur will literally adulterate any joke he finds in his own small diabolical plan to ruin comedy world wide. Without comedy, there will be no way anyone can make a intimation to a more serious topic. Without comedy, everyone will be constantly sad and have no pick me up to feel better. There is no need to reiterate how much we need comedy and we must deploy a team to stop this man. Without comedy, there is no happiness.